i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
