Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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