So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
