I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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