wrigley field is MILF paradise
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
