Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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