shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
