Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I have feelings that need drinking.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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