did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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