So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
There's a naked man in my car right now.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
