My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize