I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
