she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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