operation harelip BJ is a go
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
is wine microwaveable?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Boobs are out for the taking
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
