I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
