I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
