I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
