What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
did i walk over a car last night?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
