She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
