Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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