and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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