So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Enjoy the penises
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
