so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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