areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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