we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
