I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
