my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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