feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
