you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
