Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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