Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
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