I would go down on you faster than GM stock
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
