Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
