Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
