It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize
