I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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