i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Randomize
