Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
