I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
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