Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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