I'm really into asian looking animals
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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