Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
barbara walters just said penis...
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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