I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
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