So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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