Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize