You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
