he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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