How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Sorry my hands just texted you
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
