New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
