I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Randomize